In my role as a leadership and performance coach, I work with a variety of people… young adults who are just starting their careers, to company directors, to professional athletes.
No matter who I work with, time and time again, the most common desire is freedom.
Of course freedom comes in many different forms – financial, personal, performance, but it all boils down to the same thing. The ability to do what you love, without constraints.
When you think of freedom, what does it mean to you? Is freedom something you would want in your life?
If so, here are five intellectual steps that are necessary if you are to attain freedom in your life, inspired by motivational speaker Les Brown.
If you can master these five steps, you can manifest freedom. If you don’t freedom will always remain just out of reach:
It is possible
Earlier I asked what does freedom mean to you, in your mind you created a vision. Now think about this vision again. Make it clear and specific. Make it colourful and bright.
What happens with most people is that they start with a vision, just like you, but then say to themselves it can’t be done… This is wrong. It CAN be done.
Take a moment to think about this logically – is attaining your vision possible?
No matter how big your vision is, no matter how far away it feels right now, no matter how unlikely you think it is… The answer is YES… there is always a chance and that makes it possible!
It is vital that you understand this. Your vision is possible… It can be achieved.
It must happen
Once you know that your vision is possible, then you have hope, anticipation and momentum – Now you must choose to make it happen.
Your vision is possible – Think of how amazing your life will be when your vision manifests into reality – Don’t you deserve that future? Don’t you deserve that vision?
Make you vision so compelling and powerful… then combine it with the fundamental truth that it is possible. Do this and you will be unstoppable. Your vision stops being a dream and instead becomes essential. It becomes vital.
It becomes a MUST happen, rather than a COULD happen – and that changes the game!
It is down to me
The first two steps are about physiologically building motivation – the following two are about being mentally prepared for what it will take.
The bottom line is, you are the only person who can make your vision a reality. You are the only person who cares about it, you are the only one responsible for it, you are the only person who can drive it forwards.
If you hope someone else will do it for you – you are mistaken.
If you hope it will be given to you – you are mistaken.
If you hope you will just get lucky – you are mistaken.
Your vision is possible… You deserve it, so it MUST happen… The only person who can make it happen is you. Are you prepared to take accountability for your vision? If you want to make it a reality, you have to be.
It is going to be hard
Attaining your vision will not come easily… You will be knocked back, rejected and fail loads of times. There will be times you want to quit. There will be times when you will question your ability.
You have to be psychologically prepared for this – Because it is going to happen.
Most people are not prepared for how hard it will be and they quit – They try, they fail and they quit.
But when you know it is going to be hard, when you are ready for it to be hard, then you are able to get knocked down and get back up again.
The more you understand it is going to be hard, the more knocks you can take and keep moving forward – That is how your vision becomes reality – by NEVER giving up.
Understand it is up to you, understand it is going to be hard and it becomes possible…
It is inevitable
As soon as you have the mental toughness that comes with “It’s down to me” and “It is going to be hard” then something magical happens.
When you have a vision that you know is possible, that you are determined to make happen and are prepared to take accountability and can bounce back from any amount of failure – then your vision becomes inevitable.
If you keep on taking positive action towards your vision… and never stop, no matter what… then achieving your goal just becomes a matter of time.
One day you will win… You just have to keep fighting, until you get to that day!!
Putting it all together
You can achieve anything you want in life… anything.
But to do so you have to understand and master these five steps. The bottom line is your vision is possible – It’s then a choice if it must happen, if you are prepared to take responsibility and the knock-backs.
If you are, then success is only a matter of time… and it will be worth it!
It is the world’s worst kept secret… We all STRUGGLE… We all suffer from anxiety… We all want to be more confident in the situations that matter.
Confidence is a skill… and like any skill it can be trained. Learn more in this video:
It is at this time of year that I tend to reflect on my life more than usual – I think deeply about who I have been, who I am now and why.
It wasn’t that long ago that I was a very different person than I am now – In fact, almost three years to the day I was lost… lost in the fog and mist of depression.
You might know about my story, I have mentioned it in other posts… how I used to smoke 40 cigarettes a day, 50lbs overweight and utterly miserable – these were just the outward signals of the dark disease which was growing inside me.
I cannot accurately describe how I felt during this time… it was as though a cruel, oppressive and hurtful entity had been absorbed in every pore of my body and mind.
It felt separate from the “real” me, yet it was all consuming. I felt like I was drowning. It was scary and there didn’t seem like there was anyway out.
However there was a way out. I did escape, I haven’t fallen back, I never will – and I learnt some important lessons:
- Depression is very real and has to be taken very seriously. It is a disease and we should treat anyone caught in the midst of it with the same compassion and care as we would with any other physical disease.
- It is possible to recover from this disease.
If you have been caught by depression, please get some professional help – I can offer my advice on how I recovered and hopefully it can help – however, nothing can beat professional support, especially if depression’s claws are in deep.
The way I managed to free myself will sound simple – I decided I had to change and I started taking positive actions everyday.
I realise this will sound over simplistic and unrealistic, but it is true – I was in a desperate situation – I had to change, otherwise the consequences would have been the darkest possible.
When I made the decision it felt impossible. I had no idea what to do or where to start – what possible action could solve something as big as depression?
The thing is that is what depression wants you to think – depression wants to grow – and the perfect conditions to grow are in a static, absorbed and defeated individual..
On the contrary… I found that depression cannot grow when positive action is consistently taking place.
Success is “consistency”
It is not about one grand action that will rid you of depression forever. That is unrealistic and will make you give up when it doesn’t happen immediately.
Instead it is about momentum – lots and lots of small but positive actions to improve your situation. They can be tiny steps, but when you keep on adding more and more, the momentum becomes unstoppable.
Going for a walk in nature, writing down some goals, making the call, reading the chapter of a book, meeting with friends, seeking professional help and applying for a job… keep taking small actions.
None are the antidote to depression on its own, but together they will slowly remove the conditions for depression to grow.
As the momentum builds, so will you and so will your mind – The fog will start to lift and the oppression will be defeated.
Take positive action – any action, no matter how small… just do it consistently, don’t expect immediate results and you can change your life… I did.
What would you do for a job if you didn’t need the money?
I think that when we explore this question fully, we can discover our true passion and what we are destined to do…
Find out more in this video: